Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Good Titles are Hard to come by...

So the first day of classes came and went. Pretty Standard for a first day I would say. Introduction, handing out the syllabus, explaining the syllabus, and finally dismissing class. Luckily all my profs were very good about dismissing in a timely manner. Everyone is back at the dorm now and it is nice to see them all again. The group is slightly different from last year but once again we have a good group of guys. Jon, Pat, Chris, Me, and Alex is kinda the groupwe have right now, even though Alex is only a freshmen it is scary how good he fits in, it is like he has been here for several year plus hes just a great guy as is everyone in our group, except maybe for me. The freshmen this year are areally quiet but I have managed to meet a few of them and they have a lot of potential. Brad is a funny loud fat guy who fits in well with Pat and I, Quiet Chris, Eric, and other Jake all have a great deal of potential I think, but it takes time to open up and get comfortable with people. Tonight we watched Euro Trip which was hilarious, if you havent seen this movie you definitely should. I really like movies because the main character always manages to come out on top after getting dicked. I guess thats my subtle(or not so subtle) way of saying I have alot on my mind. But I wont go in to details and ramble on forever. Played a few dotas and Chris and Alex are coming along quite well they just need more practice, Jon is his usual dominating self, and Pat is also quite excellent as usual. Other than that I dont have anything that I'm willing to share. I hope everyones first weekof classes go well.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

A Place where the Past, Present, and Future Converge..

hey everyone. Well, what can I say I am back in Morris. I can honestly say that 6 months ago I didnt know if I would ever be returning to Morris, I even tinkered with the idea of dropping out back then, but I gutted it out and survivd the semester. Then this summer came, two months and a lot of thinking I did decide to come back. Part of me is glad to be back and part of me isnt. Needless to say on a lot of levels this is difficult for me, but I am confident I will survive. Moving in today went relatively well, however it went rather slow. I wish they would replace the hardware on the beds sooner than once every 50 years so it wasnt so difficult to disassemble then. Also for what they charge to rent a loft and deliver it, it would be nice if they set it up for you then again we are in Morris and well quite frankly orl sucks ass. We do get hbo now with our cable package and we dont have to pay a separate charge for cable this year. However knowing Morris and orl this is sure to come with some sort or horrible catch for the hbo you have to pay with 10 gallons of goats blood or something like that and for the no cable charge we will be subject to rolling black outs. The set up of our room is quite different then it has been in past years but I think its fairly cool.Tommorow I shall assist in the moving in of freshmen noobs I also hope to acquire a parking permit and my books then i will be ready for school to start on monday. SO... have you ever learned something that made you happy, sad, angry, helped things make sense and raised more questions all at the same time, I wont go into details but its weird for a single thing to do that but its true. I also must say my opinion about several people I know has changed significantly recently some for the better some for the worse. Not that I care to address any of these folks in person because I know most of them wouldnt like what I have to say but my opinion has changed none the less. So basically I will just continue operating my standard way of thinking what I want while not saying what I actually think. Oh well thats all I have for now I am sure I will see you all soon..

Saturday, August 20, 2005

I want the truth, you can't handle the truth

Hello everyone. Last night was my last night of work, it was very quiet and slow which made me happy. I got alot of hugs from the girls I work with and handshakes from the guys in addition to alot of we will miss you's. I've gotten used to saying goodbyes frequently, especially the last few years, so it doesnt really bother me anymore to leave something like a job. However I will concede that some good byes are much harder then others and some stay with you for a long time. The most amusing story I have from this week was when I was helping this couple at the front desk and they were both very drunk, so as I was checking them in the woman was staring at me and finally said wow you have really really red hair. Then they both started laughing, needless to say I was less than amused at this. Also, I always kinda thought that my hair was more orange.( Please voice your opinion by answering the survey question at the bottom of this post) Other than that work this week went relatively smooth and uneventful. I will need to stop in sometime soon and collect my 2nd to last paycheck. I will prolly end up doing that on tuesday. The situation with my car stereo has taken some annoying twists and turns but it will soon reach resoultion. The original site I ordered my speakers from is a horrible business and I reccomend no one ever do business with them.10 business days and my speakers are still not here, this is absolutely unacceptable. So severeal days ago I canceled the order and plan on returning the speakers when and if they arrive. Instead I went through Crutchfield and I highly reccomend them for any purchses involving car stereo equipment.Not only are the prices quite fair but I received the order 2 days later. This time I spent more money and ordered higher quality speakers,Infinity Kappa's very good speakers.Monday I will be having the complete system installed in my car and Tuesday I will have it back at which time I will journey to Fargo to do some shopping, pick up my paycheck, and maybe eat some Culvers. I may have to drag Pat to Fargo with me to accomplish what is needed becuase I believe he also arrives on Tuesday, however this can be easily accomplished through the offering of Culvers and Krispy Kremes. Then on Wednesday we go back to school. The day is approaching quickly. Those of you wondering about the name and format changes should refer to previous posts when I said changes were forth coming.
SURVEY QUESTION: What color is Jake's hair?
A.I think it is red.
B.I think it is ORnage.
C. I think it is( Insert yourown color or combinationof colors).
That is all I have for now. Remember there is a reason people are afraid of the dark.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Whose Got a Dime? Someones Gotta Go Back and Get a Shitload of Dimes.....

hey vanilla gorilla fans. Yes, once again it is extremely early in the morning and I am bored therefore I am blogging. Tonight will be the first day of my last week at work and then on Thursday I'm done for the summer. I really enjoyed my job for themost part, except the karokee and all the money I spent on gas. Although as far as gas is concerned I have been getting off easy compared to what the Rhino is paying in SoDak. But the income from my job will be put to good use(ha!) I ll have my insurance covered til May, a pretty sweet system in my car, my loft(which I will find a way to make pimp,(it damn well better be for what they charge to rent these things) and probably some new clothes, I usually make my clothes last for a long time but I must admit it is time for some new ones. I think you all remember the last pair of shoes I had and telling me every day for like 3 months to replace them. Well a select few of you will at least;) I will have to run to fargo for that so I will probably do that on Monday the 22nd. Then on the 23rd the Rhino is coming out to visit for a day, that should be cool. It will definitely be nice to see one of my best friends again. Who else will shout PENIS with me in a bad Austrian accent or discuss the acquisition and construction of the yak semen cannon. Actually if Jon wins that Alpacca we could make it an Alpacca semen cannon,it would be much cheaper than buying yak semen retail and we could set the freshmen to work acquring it. The only problem is what if the creature is a female alpacca.Anyways enough of my evil plans. Thats the one part of school I am looking forward to again is seeing all of you again. It will be nice to make you all laugh with my stories acquired from the Moorhead Days Inn and Conference Center and my uncanny and unsurpassed ability to suck at life. The rest of my attitude towards school right now really lies in the grey and black areas. Right now I am sure some of you are thinking to yourself hey vanilla gorilla what did youdo with your days off. Good question, I shall tell you. Not much. We have Dish now so I watched alot of tv. The other night I saw Kill Bill vloume 2, it was good, I liked the first one better. Good movie but not something I would pay to rent or buy. Thir morning I watched Troy, good movie but it brought back alot of memories:(,and no I am not saying I was an ancient greek warrior in another life or a modern day gladiator or anything like that the other kind of memories:( Then I went to sleep. SLept til about 8, totalling about 9hours of sleep. First time in along time I have been able to get more than 7, I think its because Ionly got 4 and a half the day before. Today was spent watching cartoon network and comecy central and complaining that my speakers which I ordered last sunday have still not arrived. Anyone buying stereo equipment online do not go through www.acaraudio.com they have horrible shipping. And dont pull a Noe and go through best buy they only carry low end equipment anyway(with the exception of some of the Alpine stuff they carry). Noe I dont know how you racked up 3000 diollars worth of car electronics at best buy with the stuff they have, unless u decided to purchase like 800 sq ft of dynamat or something. Noe your my friend and a really good guy but on this I msut say wtf? Hopefully the speakers arrive this week so I can have them installed along with the other components of the system that I already have on hand. No I am not doing this so I can cruise around the mall with the windows down and the system up, people who do this are losers. That about summarizes my two days off pretty boring eh?Oh well what do you all expect it's me. I dont have much else to say hard to belive I will be back in Morris in 10 days.I look forward to seeing you all again and if Mack lets me do sportsline you should all listen in to the vanilla gorilla conversaing about the wonderful world of sports and distributing his vast knowledge of the subject to everyonel;)Just remember Vanilla Gorilla FTW!!!

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Yak Semen Cannon...

hey gorilla groupies. I am not calling you groupies to offend you and I dont mean the kinda that hang on everything a person says or does and I also dont mean the kind that want to have sex with the person whose groupies they are. In fact if you have any urges to make love to the vanilla gorilla it is likely that you are legally blind or clinically insane. Immediately seek an eye exam from a licensed optometrist and a psychiatric exam from a qualified therapist. If you do not have the time or money just have a friend or relative hit you with a large heavy object in the back of the head then continue reading. I just say gorilla groupies because it sounds cooler than group of people who tolerate jake and have a mild interest in the events transpiring in his life. Honestly which one of those would make a better t shirt. Not that anyone would want to wear or possess either of them but still. Not much is new in my life, you all should know how boring I am by now. Work is going ok I only have 6 days left and tonight is the last night in my 7 day straight working session, then I work Sunday through Thursday and I 'm done. Apparently doing that baggage run the other day was a good idea, my boss told me yesterday morning that I would notice some extra money on my paycheck since i did a little over half, Chris( the guy who did the other half) agreed that it was only fair that I get half. I dont know how much it will be, with my luck it will be like 5 bucks. I do have some more interesting stories from work, actually I have a tonbut I really dont feel like writing about them right now. Everyone keeps asking me if I am excited to go back to school, the answer is not really. I am looking forward to seeing my friends again, but my reaction to the situation is very very mixed. I ll leave it at that. The other thing people keep bring up is the issue of me turning 21. I just want to make a few things clear. Turning 21 really ebars no significance for me,I dont drink now and I dont plan to start just because I turn 21. I have been known on a rare occasion to have one or 2 but I know for a fact that none of you reading this have ever seen me have a drink and I dont plan to change this. Drinking by myself or with others is something that simply does not interest me and never will. I dont like how people talk, act, and think when they drink. Thus, I chose not to put my self in a situation where people will be consuming large amounts of alcohol.I m sorry if this is disappointing to any of you but I am simply not built that way and turning 21 will not change that. I can honestly say there have only been 2 days in my life when I would have gotten drunk. I just wanted to clear this issue uop because it seems to work its way into a lot of converstions if any drinking done this year will be left to pat, jon, chris, etc etc. No knock on you guys, simply not my thing. Anywayz this has been the one and only V to the G and I'm out.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Drink Bitch...

hey Vanilla Gorilla Fans. So I know I said that the last post would be my ;ast post for awhile, I lied. I m bored and stuff happens to me so here I am. Last night was an interesting night at work, my co worker Jason wasan 1hour and 45 minutes late, sound familiar, so I had to handle all the duties of the front desk and it was uber busy. It was crazy but being the speedy and smart clerk I am I go through it;) I was lucky that no one wanted anything complicated or intricate, also the person who does the weekend lock ups didnt show up, so guess who did that, in addition to my normal duties. Think it ends there? This morning a lady in chargeof a tour company came down to the front desk asking when the tour bus' luggage would be brought out front to be loaded. Jason and I stared blankly at each other for a few seconds. The woman continued that it had to be done with in 10 minutes because they needed to have it packed and ready to go by 710, of course we dont have bellman at our hotel, so this job became mine also. I was running around the hotel with the luggage cart grabbing bags and running them out front. Luckily Chris arrived half way through the job and finished it, chris was supposed to have done the whole thing but showed up late. What can I say, I m the man!! haha jk The other interesting thing about last night is the record for people offering to buyme drinks was broken the previous record was 3. Last night 7 different people offered tobuy me drinks, 4 guys,3 girls. Now this is not uncommon usually when I give a person between 21-30 a really really good deal on a room they usually offer to buy me a drink because they say I seem like a really cool nice guy who helped them out. I think its because I give them agood rate on the room. Then there are the random drunk people from weddings and karokee that offer, and once in awhile sober people offer.But last night was insane and I must say 2 girls that offered were pretty cute and sober! Why did they offer to buy me a drink,I honeslty dont know either, its one of life mysteries. El,the manager of our comedy club offered his opinion,its because your the man and one of the most likable people I have ever met. The Vanilla Gorilla is likable? But I cant drink for several reasons, number 1 I cant drink at work, number 2 I am under age, 3 it would be quite unprofessional.Oh well, 2days down 5more to go in my 7 day straight working marathon lol.My car stereo situation should be taken care of fairly soon also. Forgive the poor spacing in this blog and my conversations becuase I am still not use to this damn key board. As usual feel free to comment on this entry. This has been the one and only the V to the G.

Saturday, August 06, 2005

And Thats the Bottom Line...

Hey everyone. I decided to blog because I have something important to say and this may end up being my last post for awhile. I have decided that I must become the man I used to be, but its one that not many of you know. Two readers will know what this means, my sister and Nick, although they read on and off at varying intervals. I'm sorry you guys but I have to do this. The rest of you dont know this guy because it was the person I was before I met any of you. But I am afraid that this is the man I must become once more. I have to replace the loud mouthed, big egoed, goofball or whatever other words or phrases you mmight use to describe me who I feel I am right now. He has failed at every juncture and now must be replaced. I need to get back to the days of being the shy quiet smart kid who kept to himself, whose primary interest(maybe even obsession) was in being the best and in attaining perfection. More importantly this guy never hurt anyone close to him and never lost anything affect any of my frienships with you guys. One thing that will never change about me is that my friends mean the world to me and I will always be there if any of you guys ever need me , please remember that any time any place any where you need significant in his life because he kept the world at arms length. I hope someday I can better explain why this had to be done, I also hope that this doesnt negatively anything all you have to do is ask and I will be there willing to lend a hand, some muscle, or a sympathetic ear. I am sorry if some of you guys like who I am and dont want me to change, but sometimes we do things we dont like in order to get by. I... dont know what else to say. This really isnt easy for me to say or do. Much love to y'all.
-Jake

Friday, August 05, 2005

Everything Looks Better in Slow Motion...

Hello again everyone. Well it's like 5 am in the morning and I have nothing to do so I thought I thought I would blog. No much is new. My ribs feel alot better now. Monday morning when I woke up my side ached really bad. I quickly rememered that I had been hit in the ribs several days earlier.Reminds me alot of football back in the day. Bust your ass on Friday night during the game and play through whatever pain you were feeling, of course if your really into the game you eventually forget what hurts and how bad. But when you wake up the next morning or the day after that it hits you like a wrecking ball that something hurts. Luckily the pain only lasted for a day or so and then subsided but I do have a pretty nice looking bruise right now. I didnt have to work tonight, which is probably why I am blogging. I work tommrow through next thursday and then havenext friday and saturdayoff, I am interested to see the schedule for the week after that to see if my schedule was set up the way I asked it to be. Those of you who know me well know that I absoultely hate asking people to do stuff for me even stupid little stuff like listening to me, which is kinda weird because I enjoy helping my friends and family whenever possible and always volunteer to help and I'm always willing to lend a sympathetic ear to any of my friends or family who need it (someone explain how that works that a person can like helping others but doesnt like asking for help or being helped himself) but I felt as though this was necessary to ask for. If it happens the way I want it to I would work next sunday to Thursday the 18th. This would give me 5 days to take care of everything before leaving for school on the 24th. A big part of it will be readjusting my schedule to that of a normal human being, ya know the kind that sleeps at night, instead of vampires like me. But we shall see, apparently before I go I am supposed to train some of the people replacing me., that should prove to be most interesting. THe good thing about working tonight is that it is payday, hooray for money or as some of you may call it cash, moola, chedda, greenbacks, yak semen, or as I like to call it money. What were you expecting A material, I dont have any A material you all should know that by now, all I got left is some Y and Z and even that is running out. However the bad part about tonight is that there is karokee, I can not emphasize how evil and wrong karokee is if you can not sing. If you can sing please do karokee and make everyone else lookbad so they will stop, but if you suck you should be beaten for even thinking about putting a microphone in your hand and singing rainbow connection at 2 in the morning, karokee lasts longer now in order tohelp attract people because North Dakota finally extended the time that bars may be open til 2 am, previously it was a 1 am limit so ppl would drive across the bridge to have a few more before going home. I have often thought about power spearing people that do this, especially the large drunk fat guys. Normally I am a very even tempered guy,but I can turn up the dial if I need to and trust me I am not really a person you want power spearing your mid section. Normally it takes alot to annoy me but karokee is just one of those thingsya know. But enough about that because I do not like to be violent. But I do remain adament that their are simply some people in this world that need to have their ass kicked. Finally got a hair cute the other day,looks and feels alot better. Also did some looking around and such for myupcoming car stereoimprovement. Team electronics quoted me 600 for everything I wanted to done and purchased which is honestly a little lower then I thought it would cost. I also checked out best buy but was unimpressed by their selection and knowledge. If you wish to know more simply ask or leaveme a comment. I realizze these days I can be rather difficult to get a hold of, not that many people actually need to. Got to talk toJon briefly the lasttwo days on Aim was nice to say hi and bs a little bit. We had an amusing conversation today. We were discussing dota and suchand I said wouldnt it be nice If dota were something that actually impressed people. You could go up to a girl and be like hey girl I am a dota master. And they would be like I know you, your the vanilla gorilla the big bad dota daddy. Iof course would nod and smile and be like baby not only am I the big bad dota daddy but I am also the big bad booty daddy. lol I found this rather amusing. But I think for that line to even have a shot at working it would have to be delivered by someone with infinitely more game then myself, maybe pat wearing his cream suit or Jon in genral or some my other brothers with game reading this you know who you guys are;)But definitely not me, I lead and rich fnatasy life and it works there. Anyone know where I can acquire a magic lamp or some other wish granting device to change fantasy into reality or a time machine would be nice. Did ya ever notice thatgenies alwayscome from something like lamps or bottles or rings. I mean you never heard of the genie of the AMC pacer, or the genie of the shovel, or the genie of vaccuum cleaner. Ok that was random but oh well. Lol I would need a genie to create a world where I was a pimp and/or had game. Ah well I guess thatsone of those things you either got it or ya dont. It s ok though I accept who I am, well at least for the most part. What else do I have to say. Oh I can do another installment of Gorila Grooves( in other words me telling you guys some new songs I think are cool and you should give a listen to, I gave it a name because I thought it was cool). This editions Gorilla Grooves are
Fall Out Boy- Sugar we're ging down
Fall Out Boy- Grand Theft Autumn
Bow Wow- Let me Hold You
Bowling for Soup- Almost
Bowlingfor Soup- Ohio(comeback to Texas)
New Found Glory- Forget my Name
50cent- Shake that Ass
Papa Roach- Scars
Give these songs and bands a listen if you have the time and energy. Sorry for the length of my last several posts but when I am bored and have nothing better to do I tend to come here and jot down some thoughts and happenings from my life. I try tokeep it fairly limited but I realize that once in awhile a feeling or emotion manages to sneak its way in, sorry about that I am really trying to keep them outof my posts and conversations and such. I will make greater efforts on the length issue, although I have neverheard any complaints about my length before;) lol Sorry had to say it. Alright I' m out,once again this has been the one andonly the v to g peace and much love to all my gorilla groupies out there. lol jk

Monday, August 01, 2005

The Weekend...

hey Vanilla Gorilla fans. I thought since some interesting events happened lately that I might talk about them and my thoughts before I go off to bed. Saturday night was a pretty long and difficult night at work. When I got there I found out that we had an unusually rowdy wedding party, nothing that special. 15 minutes into my shift
a huge fight breaks out in the reception area and manges to spill ino the lobby. About 8- 12 guys brawling and beating the hell out of each other. Kevin and Brad our 2 weekend secuirty guards couldnt handle it themselves so Sean and I were asked to jump in and help handle them.We immediatley called the police and they told us there they would have someone their as soon as possible and try our best to get the situation under control. So each of us was trying to restrain several people. Sean got a beer bottle thrown at him which barely missed his head, Kevin was being threatened by a guy brandishing an empty vodka bottle and periodically swinging it violently around, and I took a sucker punch to the ribs. Brad said he was suprised that I didnt react or seem injured after being hit. Apparently the guy got a good full swing and connected with my ribs well, which I felt later I had my back turned trying to restain one of his friends and only knew he hit me when it happened. all the guys their said they were suprised that I didnt beat the crap out of the drunk who hit me and said they would have had my back if I wanted to. The 4 of us prolly could have taken them all being as we are all sober and all run 6'2 230 plus. But I thought to myself we really dont need to wreck the lobby and get 4 more guys involved in the fight so I m glad I didnt go after the guy. Please dont mistake this for cowardice or lack of fighting ability, I wasnt happy about being hit but I dont think its worth a massive brawl and massive damage to the lobby to quench my thirst for revenge. Oh well think of me however you chose. The night only seemed to get worse fromt their. After the police arrived and sorted the whole matter out my fellow front desk worker Jason started puking his guts out and had to go home. This left me to run the entired front desk the rest of the night, not a fun or small task. Also we hadmany porblems with train workers running out of rooms that night that I was left to deal with on my own, some of them had to wait several hours for a room to open up and be cleaned and needless to say they were not ahppy about it. I chalk that up to bad management for trying to whore out their rooms to regular customers to make more money instead of abide by the contract that both parties signed. Shrugs I dont make the decisions I just do as I m told and deal with the consequecnes of managements decisions. The boss did write an email to everyone on monday saying that everyone owed me a big thank you for keeping the hotel running the rest of the night and getting everything taken care, it was a smal gesture but I thought it was nice. Sunday was a much more uneventful evening thankfully. Hard to believe I will only be working 19 more days, feels like just yesterday I started this job. I guess I cant decide whether summer went by too fast or too slow I guess for me it was a little of both mixed in with alot of other stuff. Most of which wasnt very positive but I dont wanna bore you all with the details of that or depress anyone. I have decided that Eventually I would very much like to weigh 185lbs, I realize I havent been that light since my junior year in high school when I was 5'11 but at that weight I was ripped. Even after working all summer in the weight room running and doing plyometrics I was only at 205 my senior year but I was still in awesome shape. Now look at me, kinda sad really. Thats why when I go back to school I plan to start working out on a regular basis. 185 is my target But I could be satisfied with even 205. An added bonus is that it may help attract females to me, it seems to me that girls would rather have a guy with big muscles and nice abs then then a vanilla gorilla(example yours truley). Oh well it prolly wont work, most of my plans dont, but I figure its worth a shot. The results of last post survery are in and it was a 1-1 ties, so we have no definite answer on whether or not everything is better with the vanilla gorilla. However I tend to agree with Jon that everything was prolly a poor part of that question, I mean having the vanilla at your prostate exam or with you while you want to spend private time with your significant other is probably most undesirable, so maybe A better question to ask is are most things better when you add the vanilla gorilla. I honestly dont know where I come up with this stuff, there must be something horribly wrong with me and hprribly wrong with you people for befriending me. lol I dont know which it is. Honestly why do you people hang around me and or read my blog. I warn you dont do it for to long or Ill drag ya down with me. ummmm not much else to report. I will be improving the stereo system in mycar shortly and I will update on that when details are forth coming. As usual feel free to comment on any or all of this post. THis has been the one and only the V to the G, I m out.